


sick of feelin' the lows

by fleeting interest (NorthOfSomewhere)



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Flash Fic, New Year's Eve, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-18 20:20:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29374485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NorthOfSomewhere/pseuds/fleeting%20interest
Summary: It's definitely not her first cup of the night. So maybe that accounts for why she's not as careful as she should be.
Relationships: Fiona Gallagher/Lip Gallagher
Kudos: 8





	sick of feelin' the lows

**Author's Note:**

> Oops, I wrote this for New Year's and forgot to post it.

Lip hands her a plastic cup filled to the brim, their fingers touch on the exchange.

It's definitely not her first cup of the night. So maybe that accounts for why she's not as careful as she should be.

Fiona's addicted to the way he looks at her. Validation is a strong drug. Each time is affirmation that she's wanted, that someone cares about her. She grins and pulls him close, one hand gripping his shirt, the other trying and failing to keep her cup steady. The drink spills over her fingers. It'll be sticky later but for now she doesn't care.

Fiona kisses him to the sound of Kev whooping in the background and Veronica laughing. There's a neediness she's trying not to convey. She pushes him away from her after a moment when it gets to be too much. He looks dazed, mouth open a little.

"Happy New Year," she says.

"Jesus, Fi. It's not even midnight yet," Lip says, and he doesn't sound mad, but there's something about his tone that sets off warnings for her.

She tells herself it's okay, that the rejection she feels is all in her head.

She shrugs, fakes a smile for him. "I gotta fit everyone in before then."

It's a lie. She was just caught up in the moment. But it's a lie she doesn't mind following through on, it's just their friends after all.

And in a way she hopes it makes Lip jealous.

_It probably won't._

She downs what's left of the alcohol in her cup, the burn of it in her throat all too welcome.

_Whatever, I don't fucking care._

"Gotta go get some more," she says before ducking into the kitchen. The music is just as loud here. But it's empty for now. No Kev and V and their relationship that's okay to be public about because they're not fucking related, or Dad rambling on about some bullshit conspiracy theory. No younger siblings staring at her, depending on her to hold everything together.

She decides to wash her hands, throwing the cup in the garbage can first. It's plastic and empty and it doesn't make a sound as it lands. It's disappointing in a way she wouldn't be able to explain to anyone. This is one of the things she hates about herself, this need for destruction, the anger curling her fingers into fists. The ache in her chest and throat from holding back tears. She allows herself one half formed sob while the water is running.

Then she takes a deep breath.

And another.

And another.

Fiona knows why her emotions are all over the place lately.

This has to end at some point.

Not now, but some day.

_Soon._   
  
  



End file.
